I was waiting on a table tonight. An elderly man and a younger woman (I thought). He was slightly hunched over and a bit confused. I was so busy. I had people waiting on me. Inside I wondered if he would ever be able to tell me what he wanted to eat. It took him a long time to decide. As the other customers waited, in a fleeting moment I thought about how impatient I could be, and how this might just get under some one's skin. But then I decided, I would be there for them instead of rushing him or getting upset as I felt the other customers staring at me. I thought immediately about my meditation challenge I've been doing and how this has somehow helped me to be present, in a time such as this. The woman with him, who I assumed was his daughter was so sweet and caring. Eventually, he ordered. I reached out and touched his shoulder and smiled before I left them. After a long dinner, which he could barely eat, his "daughter" came to me and said, "I want to thank you for being so kind and patient with my husband." I said, "I wouldn't dream of being any other way. Did you say husband?" I must've stammered my words a bit. She smiled at me. "Yes, my husband."
"I'm sorry, I assumed because of the age difference he might actually be your..." (Oh dammit, sometimes I say stupid shit, right. out. loud!)
She laughed at me and gave herself a little hug while making imaginary kisses at me. A gesture for assuming she was so young.
She said, "I'm actually older than him. He's only 68, but I'M 69." He was up at the salad bar, so he didn't hear our conversation. A few months ago, she explained, he went in for a routine shoulder surgery, but something went wrong with the anesthesia. "He went in a high powered executive, my future, my dreams, the greatest, most romantic man, I've ever known went in for surgery, but didn't come back the same. He only has two to five years the doctors told me." I turned and looked at him slowly maneuvering the salad bar. I sat down with her and got in real close like two girlfriends talking and smiled. "He's romantic...?" She beamed like a beacon of light and I could see the memories flowing out of her mind onto the table like warm gooey taffy on a spinner.... "The most romantic man you could've imagined. Years and years of being romanced (still hugging herself)... For all those years he gave to me, I figured I would never give up on him now" and she hadn't. She sat with him so patiently, never fussed, never hurried him, nor did she try doing everything for him. Such a loving and respectful woman, who wouldn't dream of taking away what independence her husband had left. Dear god I loved those (now) brief moments with them. That's the meaning of true love.
"I'm sorry, I assumed because of the age difference he might actually be your..." (Oh dammit, sometimes I say stupid shit, right. out. loud!)
She laughed at me and gave herself a little hug while making imaginary kisses at me. A gesture for assuming she was so young.
She said, "I'm actually older than him. He's only 68, but I'M 69." He was up at the salad bar, so he didn't hear our conversation. A few months ago, she explained, he went in for a routine shoulder surgery, but something went wrong with the anesthesia. "He went in a high powered executive, my future, my dreams, the greatest, most romantic man, I've ever known went in for surgery, but didn't come back the same. He only has two to five years the doctors told me." I turned and looked at him slowly maneuvering the salad bar. I sat down with her and got in real close like two girlfriends talking and smiled. "He's romantic...?" She beamed like a beacon of light and I could see the memories flowing out of her mind onto the table like warm gooey taffy on a spinner.... "The most romantic man you could've imagined. Years and years of being romanced (still hugging herself)... For all those years he gave to me, I figured I would never give up on him now" and she hadn't. She sat with him so patiently, never fussed, never hurried him, nor did she try doing everything for him. Such a loving and respectful woman, who wouldn't dream of taking away what independence her husband had left. Dear god I loved those (now) brief moments with them. That's the meaning of true love.
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